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Thursday, February 4, 2016
MICHIGAN FANS CLAIM BASKETBALL LOSS TO HOOSIERS A "FLUKE", SAY UM ACTUALLY "WON"
Most of us thought that Indiana pounded Michigan in basketball on Tuesday night, but the Michigan fan-base has a new way of looking at it. Everybody could see the 28-point run by the Hoosiers wrapped-up that game early, but the UM Stats Team has crunched the numbers, examined the data, and come to a startling conclusion. They claim the Wolverines actually "won" that game, since the chances of a 28-0 run in college basketball are astronomical.
In other words, the 28-0 run by Indiana was A "FLUKE", and without it, Michigan actually won the game by a score of 67-52.
Well, now, that makes more sense, doesn't it? The chances of what Indiana did are so unlikely that the outcome doesn't actually count. That's "Wolverine Logic", as applied by so many chUMps so many times to the football game played on October 17 in Ann Arbor.
According to the laws of Science, results only count when they are repeatable. So, scientifically speaking, the 27-23 win by Michigan State over Michigan is not a true outcome. That's why UM actually "won" that game.
Same story with the Indiana basketball blowout. The Michigan Stats Team has determined that the odds of a team outscoring another team during B1G conference play, by 28 points to zero points, beginning at exactly the 9:08 mark of the first half and extending to exactly the 18:37 mark of the second half are approximately 9,749,258-to-1. In other words, it's impossible that would ever happen again, therefore, it didn't ever happen in the first place. Got that?
Based on this scholarly analysis, the UM Basketball Team is actually a #1-seed right now, for both the B1G conference tournament and the NCAA tournament. After all, any team that could knock-off Indiana by 15 points is a force to be reckoned with!
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